Should I even care?

Donnabobhair
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Should I even care?

Postby Donnabobhair » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:26 am

I am a heterosexual male.

barbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 4:50 pm

Re: Should I even care?

Postby barbie » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:26 am

At my apartment and workplace, all know that I am a dad. Nevertheless, I do wear heels,
skirts and makeup. Sometimes I wear nude bra under strapless bra. I think passing is
meaningless in this case.

Barbie~~

Posted on: July 30, 2008, 05:02:11 PM

Today I wear red lipstick at time first time at my workplace. Usually I wear
translucent lip gross here. People commented that I look like wearing very deep makeup,
but it's just lipstick.My boss also commented on my lipstick in the morning. People no
longer wonder my crossdressing. Neverthelss, I avoid skirts at work place.

Barbie~~

greeneyedgirl
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby greeneyedgirl » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:27 am

Okay, I'm going to add my nickles worth and hope I don't get chased out of the place
like I did at the one group I went to years ago.

I'll preface this by saying that I cannot even imagine what your lives are like, me, I
couldn't muster up enough male energy to pass even when I was trying so hard to live
that way. I'm a girl, woman, person of the female persuasion, always have
been.

Okay, disclaimer done with, I personally think passing is passe. Passing is an
illusion, a "standard" someone else sets for us because socio-culturally people are
obsessed with gender, with rules that everyone MUST follow because individual freedom
is anthem to fitting in. If you don't do anything that is going to compromise
your own personal safety, you should be allowed to wear anything you want, anytime you
want. "Passing" is a trap we all get lured into, and we spend so much time being
obsessed about "passing" we surrender our feelings, our freedom, our confidence, self
esteem and everything else.

So we need to worry less about passing, and more about expressing ourselves honestly,
allowing our inner beauty to shine and fill the room. Passing becomes a non-issue
when we are free and shining our own light. Do things within reason, draw
positive, encouraging, uplifting attention to yourself and allow yourself to flow,
radiating poise, grace an

Tracy
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby Tracy » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:27 am

Greeneyedgirl: What a great reply!

I don't worry too much about passing as I am very careful to be out and about when the
chances of being seen are low. Yes, I'm a chicken in addition to being a feminine male
who likes the attentions of males.

Donnabobhair: Thanks for sharing your wonderful thoughts/life. I feel happy reading
your post.

barbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 4:50 pm

Re: Should I even care?

Postby barbie » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:28 am


cindybc
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby cindybc » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:28 am

Hi Greeneyedgirl, glad that we crossed paths once more. I quite agree with all that you
have said. Even thought I have posted many words of similar thoughts it is wonderful to
meet another that speaks similar words, like minds? Perhaps.

I just wished to add to the part you mention, "instead of passing why not expressing
ourselves honestly" to the outside world. Well I have called this in past posts as
projecting, projecting what you wish other people to see you as. This can be
accomplished in part with a positive attitude and an upbeat personality. As for the
passing part, look around you, pay attention more to how most other women around you
dress, and for what ever occasions. It's always wise to look around the place or places
you will be visiting and pay note how others are dressing.

Same with the work place. This way if one dresses accordingly you will blend in and
become just one of the girls. It's what you have just suggested above and what I have
shared in this post I have found out personally that it works quite well, proper make
up, and the nail polish applied appropriately, hair groomed, or if one has sparse hair
get a good quality wig, and you will blend in.

We should start a school for teaching our new TS girls on how to groom and dress
properly and how to present. Maybe kind of like a charm school? "Hee, hee, hee."

Cindy

greeneyedgirl
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby greeneyedgirl » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:29 am


cindybc
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Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:32 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby cindybc » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:29 am

Hi Greeneyedgirl hon
I was just messing around when I mentioned the school and actually surprised to learn
that you had in truth done some schooling. You are quite right you don't have to be an
empath to learn how to project but once you get the knack on how to do it, it works
when ever you desire it to work. No magic just requires an upbeat attitude and
personality. But then we all have some down days, like yesterday I spent the entire day
having the classical runny nose and red eyes from one who cried to much and for no
truly justifiable reason that I could think of.

Cindy

Suzy
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Joined: Fri Jan 27, 2017 7:43 am

Re: Should I even care?

Postby Suzy » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:30 am

Donnabobhair,

First, thank you so very much for sharing your life with us. There are many who
feel much as you do, and will no doubt be encouraged by your story.

Should you care? I think the question itself is somewhat of an oxymoron.
The fact is that you do not care, and I have rarely met anyone who can be argued into
caring about something that they do not. The obvious truth is that you are happy
the way you are. So why spoil it? You have obviously gotten the appropriate
warnings about being careful, since not everybody can be trusted to be accepting.
But other than that, why would you mess up something that is a natural expression of
who you are?

I think you hit on one of the most important distinctions here, the difference between
being feminine and female. IMHO, most people who crossdress know they are not
female, but simply seek a healthy way to express their feminine side. Others of
us truly believe we are female inside. That opens up a much bigger can of
worms.

Personally, I wish I could be like you and not worry about the passing thing. It
would sure take a lot of the pressure off. I don't consider myself a vain person,
but I do know it is very important to me. I don't feel myself when I am just
dressed in feminine clothes. I only do when I am out there, being female and
being perceived as such. Again, I am not saying this

Constance
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Nov 12, 2016 4:04 pm

Re: Should I even care?

Postby Constance » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:31 am

OK, here's my $.02.

I guess when I think about "passing" I mean that I want to look as "feminine" as
possible. If I convince someone, cool. If I make them uncertain, that's even
better.

Biologically, I'm male. Psychologically, I'm androgyne. There are days when I feel
"masculine," days when I feel "feminine," and days where I'm somewhere in between.
Cross-dressing, to me, is something I do for me. I guess I'd prefer to pass so
convincingly that I would not be harrassed or assaulted. Living in the SF Bay Area
helps limit those risks, I'd tend to think.

tslut0
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2016 5:21 pm

Re: Should I even care?

Postby tslut0 » Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:31 am

The fact that I am out there being myself is most important. I pass for the
most part. If I'm read by others that's alright, too. I dress sensibly and age
appropriate. My wife says that my stuff looks better than hers. I let her borrow my
sweaters, skirts, blouses, and jewelry. I can see situations which are not safe or make
me unconfortable so I avoid them. I just enjoy myself and live my life.

Gennee


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